


A Void Player

by SkaianClouds



Category: Homestuck
Genre: aaaaangst, post Game Over
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-19
Updated: 2015-04-19
Packaged: 2018-03-24 17:31:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3777295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkaianClouds/pseuds/SkaianClouds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You suppose that the empty feeling comes with being a Void player.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Void Player

You suppose that the dull, empty feeling comes with being a Void player.

You just watched your teen mom, if you could call her that, die in your arms. You cried, not even feeling what you should have - your head is telling you that you need to cry but your heart feels nothing.

John is standing there, and the whole world is silent. You think he says something, but you don’t hear. Inside of you is mind-numbing blankness. You can barely think, let alone speak (you feel the words coming out but you don’t hear them), and you continue to sit there, watching her dead body, hoping that somehow that the clock is going to give you your mom back, the mom you never got to know, the mom you always wanted to know.

Your hopes are unfounded; it’s been at least five minutes and there’s no sign of regeneration, though your sense of time is somewhat skewed. Five minutes, five hours, it makes no difference.

And then the emotions hit you like a bus, fear, guilt, anger, depression, and the thoughts are back too, _why couldn’t you save her, why can’t you do anything, why does everything you touch keep falling apart._ They’re gone as quickly as they came.

 _Why can’t you feel more_.

You guess you gave everything away, and left nothing for yourself, spent too much trying to fix everyone else, and in some sick way, you’re happy not to feel.

No, feel’s not the right word, you feel everything with a certain clarity. There’s just a feeling of detachment from them.

And the emptiness is replaced by a desire to fix it, no matter the cost. You don’t care what it takes, you would give your life to fix everything, but you're a giver, and you can’t give something you don’t have.

You hear John mention his Denizen, and you say that you will see yours too. He leaves, and the Breeze brushes against your cheek.

As you begin your journey, you hope that he can find something to help.

Not that hope ever mattered that much anyway.

The Page is dead, your hope is lost.

       The Maid is dead, your life means nothing.

              The Prince is dead your heart is gone.

 

The Rogue lives on, the Void expands.

**Author's Note:**

> so this has been sitting on my computer collecting dust for the last month  
> this is barely canon like wtf  
> anywhoo  
> happy late 4/13
> 
> homestuck does not belong to me


End file.
